"Further"

Gosh I haven't blogged in so long I almost forgot I even still had this. Life has been crazy and quite honestly the last thing I feel like doing after an almost 12 hour work day is turn on a computer.

I started thinking about why I originally started this blog in the first place and it was because I needed a place to put my thoughts, my anger, my sadness and happiness all in once place. When I was diagnosed again with breast cancer in 2012, I just had to put my thoughts down. I look back at those posts and I can see how angry, frustrated and sad I was. And I look where I am now, and I am just so removed from those days. That's why I titled this blog "Further" and had to , of course, post the video of one of my favorite singers Griffin House's song "Further". Plus, I mean, who doesnt want to stare at him :)

I never thought there would be a day in my life that I didnt think about cancer. It took my life over. I couldnt stop thinking about it. I was pissed off at the world. And who could blame me, quite honestly. Those that told me not to dwell on it or I should move on with my life were right to a certain degree. However, until you have cancer you cant tell how people how they should react or feel. You have to go through pain, the anger and the sadness in your own way. And if that means being pissed off at the world, so be it. Is it healthy to react that way? Absolutely not. But everyone deals with things differently. I had to go through the process. I am an emotional person. I take things personally. And I took getting cancer, not once but twice, as the ultimate slap in the face.

These days I don't really think about cancer and my previous situations. And when people find out what I have been through they cant believe it. I look at it this way: It happened. I got through it. It made me a stronger person. It helped me realize what a strong person I actually am and how I can deal with anything that is put in my way. No obstacle stands a chance against my strength, my determination and my sense of humor. Because let's be honest here: You have to have a sense of humor to be able to withstand the bullshit that cancer brings into your life.

I wish I could find more time to blog but honestly it wont be about cancer anymore. I am no longer in that mindspace so I feel the words are just empty. I will, however, be happy to give you my opinions on such topics as The Duggar's, Donald Trump, midgets and creepy dolls......

XOXO
B-